Friday, June 2, 2017

Plugging mouths

Oh a shooting star!
- Don't tell me your wish, or it will not come true.
- I already didn't!

Where do you see yourself in five years?
- I don't

Would you keep quiet?
- Won't you?

Name one thing that is worse than people talking behind your backs!
- Nobody talking behind your back?

This is the happiest day of my life!
- You see where it is leading?

What is your strongest move you can do professionally?
- Killing the next person who speaks.

I can't pay you but you will get great visibility
- So will you with my SEO-designated blog-missile

Eighties just called and they want your "funny" joke back!
- I can't hear the laughter track, bro
- They don't use laughter tracks in intelligent shows, Yolo!

Which one is cooler; Ice-Cube or Ice-T?
- Hahahahaa. Is this one of those Vanilla Ice jokes?
- Don't push it
- Why
- Because you can't touch this

A Rabbi, a Muslim, and an atheist goes into a bar and --
- Stop it. You are just trying to make an obvious joke about peace, prosperity and social ladders, and that everybody should mind their own fucking business because there is no joke. Except the peace. Which is a joke.
- As a Muslim if with you man, except I am also suicidal.
- As a Rabbi I only care about the glory.
- Wait. No.
- You should always see four quotes beforehand.
- Are
- Are?
- You?
- You
- Going?
- Going
- To
- What? a checkmate?

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