Saturday, June 17, 2017

Old script living

I must admit that I pressure myself to writing, and to be creative. This feels still weird. 

Oil spill stopped under 200 bars of pressure. Of he goes again. Just to celebrate saved ocean life. This time in Las Vegas. His part time nemesis Joker recognizes the armour that my son is wearing.
He walks closer.
Even closer.
"Lex Luthor wants to buy you a drink," says Lex Luthor.
Uncomfortable as my son some time is he whistles and Iron Man's armour flies through the ceiling. With a spin of a hand - basically just finger - the whole armor gets attached into him. May I remind that this is the prototype of mark 42. In the movies they use cgi.
"Sorry, busy," my son says and flies to New York. It wasn't a disaster. It could have been. My son doesn't have disasters, he has cramps. Inherited. Sorry.
Anyways. Lots of thumb-thumbs, and of he goes. Did you know that Metropolis is trying to be New York. My son landed on the highest of the buildings. Andrew Webb was waiting for him in his mark 42 armor. Anything less would have made Webb's spider senses tingle. May I note that my son was also wearing similar kind of armor - just much more fabulous.
All trademark-satiriximus are intentional.

Friday, June 2, 2017

Plugging mouths

Oh a shooting star!
- Don't tell me your wish, or it will not come true.
- I already didn't!

Where do you see yourself in five years?
- I don't

Would you keep quiet?
- Won't you?

Name one thing that is worse than people talking behind your backs!
- Nobody talking behind your back?

This is the happiest day of my life!
- You see where it is leading?

What is your strongest move you can do professionally?
- Killing the next person who speaks.

I can't pay you but you will get great visibility
- So will you with my SEO-designated blog-missile

Eighties just called and they want your "funny" joke back!
- I can't hear the laughter track, bro
- They don't use laughter tracks in intelligent shows, Yolo!

Which one is cooler; Ice-Cube or Ice-T?
- Hahahahaa. Is this one of those Vanilla Ice jokes?
- Don't push it
- Why
- Because you can't touch this

A Rabbi, a Muslim, and an atheist goes into a bar and --
- Stop it. You are just trying to make an obvious joke about peace, prosperity and social ladders, and that everybody should mind their own fucking business because there is no joke. Except the peace. Which is a joke.
- As a Muslim if with you man, except I am also suicidal.
- As a Rabbi I only care about the glory.
- Wait. No.
- You should always see four quotes beforehand.
- Are
- Are?
- You?
- You
- Going?
- Going
- To
- What? a checkmate?

Saturday, May 20, 2017

Welcome to Sinn Fein

I am not the only one who sees that the politics in crisis. In a countries where there is a freedom to vote, people abstain using that power that a lots of other people used gunpowder, ink and manpower to achieve.

There are not many good reasons to avoid the crisis. There are too many good things in life and too little trustworthy parties to just go for it. For me it was kind of easy. I've been a party member before, I know the crisis (for me it has been that parties should be judged by their goals and their doings). I've been and I still am a member of organized and less organized political movements. Sinn Fein is not the most leftist or a liberal party of Ireland, but it's hefty lot more credible than the labour party. It kind of reminds me of a party that I used to belong. It was Left Alliance back in Finland. It wasn't the most liberal and the most to the left, but it was the party whose other member wanted positions themselves there.

When I joined Sinn Fein I was actually surprised that somebody called me, just to check what kind of a member I wanted to be. I was happy with the idea that I just join the party and can support it with my subscription fee. I got surprised by that proactiviness I did enjoy it even though I could have lived without it.

We met with this Party Worker (I don't know if it's appropriate to say his name as this is a public blog), and his reason was only that because we work from the grassroot-level (my words, not his) that we want to know what people want to do in the party. People can be supporters, and it's a big thing; Joining a party is already a big step because you are aligning yourself with the ideas of a party.

To keep it short.
There might be some political stuff on this blog.
I wanted to write about Finnish government possible trying to make slavery official.
It is nice to write stuff.
I enjoy writing.

This is not a poem.

Wednesday, October 26, 2016

Imagine there is no religions

What if Ireland would be more secular society. 

Here is a quote from Star Trek Deep Space Nine, season 4, episode 16:

"No more ceremonies to attend.
No more blessings to give.No more prophecies to fulfill.I'm just a Starfleet officer again.All I have to worry about are The Klingons, The Dominion and The Maquis.I feel like I'm on vacation."

Friday, October 14, 2016

Epitaph of Nobel

I'm trying to find reasons why the artist formerly known as Robert Zimmerman should not get the Nobel for Literature. Norwegians are already giving the peace price for anybody just for pretending to try.
Jean-Paul Sartre refused of the mentioned acknowledgment because he didn't want literature to become an institution. Later on he changed his mind but the Swedish academy of Sciences wanted to respect the artist's previous stronger performance and declined. And Bob still played a concert in a small Danish pub at the change of the Millennium.
Darion Fo's sarcastic and playful playwrights are short stories compared to some of the previous winners. The ones that kind of gave precedent for Harold Pinter's win. Both were mostly playwrights and were never considered truthfully authors in the long play of marathon novelists. And Bob wrote even shorter pieces.
Doris Lessing wrote a lot about white people living in Africa, about strong and sneaky women, and about men who were not destined to do big things but to fail in the long run. Men and women spent hours to finish her books. And Bob's lyrics still make people think is "it an accident made into a rhyme, or a rhyme to make the poem stand?"
At least all the winners have written. The Norwegian assembly should learn about the premises of making notes of great people at work. If Dylan would have won the peace prize somebody would have criticized the peace prize again for giving it into the wrong hands.
At least he wrote something about peace. We should give literature prices for people who write pieces about peace. We should do it in all categories. I believe that was Nobel's idea. Peace out.

Saturday, September 24, 2016

Comfortable monologue for oneself

I meant to publicsh thszich here:

My Rant (written for a female actor, can also be a male)
1. Only to be spoken out loud
2. Where people can smoke
3. Inside
4. Can also be done outside
5. Has to be to the letter
6. The speaker, or the spoker, or the midnight joker
7. Must get it right on the first run
8. Must be
9. Alive
10. Thinier than the olympic athletes
11. But not as thin as the female beauty contestants
12. Could be cool
13. If they would rule
14. The dynasty that they become
15. would be fun
16. Tiny breasts or little buts they shall not have
17. Bigger bottoms they might keep as they are --
18. this should rhyme, resonate, or dare I say it
19. Somebody died
20. more intelligent, more kind, more animal than you and I
21. Nature says, nature does, and it doesn't hold, oh dear, your eye

Rest in Peace
I'm glad I can bury
Into the hole
All that is whole

Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Metal Gear Solid going all Irish

I have a tendency of watching a lot of game-related videos on Youtube. I try to explain to myself, that it is part of my work. But with all the hours spend watching those would get my employers sued for slavery, so let's say that I do it do keep myself up to date. Who am I fooling? I'm watching videos made at the age of Early Internet (also referred to as E.I.).

My today's project has been to find all the parts of Metal Gear Solid the Irish edition, and by watching myself from the mirror I can count from my tears that I have failed. There are supposedly five episodes, and I've only been able to find 4 of them. Originally they were published on gaming -channel on Youtube, and I can't imagine what kind of sick game they are playing.

7 videos and only 4 MGS!!!

So dear Internet, if you know where the first part is, please post it below in the comments sections. Under here you can find all the four episodes in chronological order. After watching this epic Irishized version of the original Metal Gear Solid, you will understand my pain.

This might be where it all started. (Watch: Metal Gear 'Scholid' is a thing and we can thank Viper Higgins for it)